I am Jack Hepplewhite aka MrBlindPig presents...

Published 26 Jan 2012 11:30 0 Comments

This week I bring you minutes from the recent summit of World Bodies For And Against Change (WSFAAC), as they debate the recent copyright infringement bills assembled by former Fame Academy finalist, now US Representative and SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) creator, Lamar S. Smith.

1) Mr Smith suggested that the bill was essential to protect the intellectual intelligence of the intellectual's property, which, with the current lax laws, allow virtually anyone with knowledge of Google's domain to easily buy music, films and porn for free.

2) The APS (Association Of Postal Services) man seconded the motion, pointing to a similar decline in his sector. He added that while they wanted the elimination of email included, they were still fully supportive of the bill, but thought there was no rush to push it through.

3) The fat cat representing the CIJFH (Conservative Idea For Jobs For Horses) suggested that a similar plight had seriously changed the way in which his affiliates had to work. Once the motor car had all but eradicated the need for horses, the JFH had successfully promoted a new sport in which instead of carrying people for necessity, horses raced one another. Life in fact improved, only for the elite, but we can't all be winners, hey toff-toff, he said, as he wagged his tail back and forth making the Member For The Protection Of Pollen (POP) sneeze profusely.

4) Henry, from the Protestant Or You'll Be Hung Drawn And Quartered group (POYBHDAQ), venomously challenged the motion, suggesting innovation should be allowed to flourish, quite, that it should even be enforced with brutality.

5) H. Dumpty, supporting the FEEDME organisation (Food Eagerly Encourages Moral Ethics), sat on the wall-like fence.

6) George representing the League Of Varmint Excess (LOVE) said it was important that civil liberties were crushed otherwise his bible of the 2nd coming, 1984, would never reach its fruition.

7) Mr Man, defending the point of view of M (Milkmen), started to third the bill's motion but had to leave the meeting early, as the representative from the CIJFH wouldn't stop licking him.

8) Mr Dumpty fell off the fence.

Exciting stuff. Next week we monitor proceedings at the meet to discuss PIPA, and what we are going to do with her now she's lost her benefits. Join the debate about the future.

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This article appeared in Reading Chronicle 26 Jan 12

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