LibCons scene smacks of teenage nonsense

Maurice O'Brien • Published 28 Oct 2010 11:30 0 Comments

See also:

IF EVER anyone needed convincing that the fatuous claim about us “all being in this together” is total bunkum, then hopefully they watched glutinous George deliver his Comprehensive Spending Review.

There they were, a giggle of LibCons, squashed on to the front bench, fighting for camera angles like a bunch of smug, sixth formers who had come up with enough glib one-liners to win a debate on the proposition that £81 billion cuts are good for you.

As little George delivered the prescription for turning Britain from a debtors’ orgy into a defenceless, fifth-rate banana republic with all the joie de vivre of an Enver Hoxha comedy night in old Tirana, the one certainty was that the poor were visibly growing poorer and the rich were continuing to do very nicely, thank you.

How they rolled around on the Coalition benches, well-upholstered backsides cushioned by their own principles, as wee George’s quips-per-cuts ratio soared and the tax-evading accountants rubbed their hands in glee at the rapid return on their political investments.

And instead of outrage from the opposition, we had Shadow Chancellor Alan Johnson - who admits he’s to economics what Ann Widdecombe is to the corps de ballet - doing a Norman Wisdom tribute with a working men’s club routine which had his lot falling about and slapping their thighs like Gordon Brown never existed.

The previous day, some papers had carried a picture of the Boy Dave, sitting with hands clasped and head bowed at a memorial service for a police officer killed in the line of duty. As I admired the clever posing of the shot, I instantly reproved myself for such cynicism. But boy, when it comes to cynical, our reptilian Parliamentarians can shame us all.

Don’t forget, it was a week when some were celebrating that scientist David Kelly wasn’t murdered. Never mind that the poor man was hounded into taking his own life for telling the truth.

Still, at least they know how to empty the prisons. Let anyone guilty of obtaining property by deception simply apologise and walk away, just like those Parliamentary expenses cheats.

REPORTS that more than a thousand chancers tried to claim the record £113 million Euro lottery jackpot reminded me of a teenage afternoon on the South Bank at Reading’s old Elm Park ground.

At halftime an announcement, delivered deadpan, came over the tannoy. “Someone’s handed in a purse. Would the owner please form a queue outside the office.”

Return to the main index, get more from this section or browse our Opinion archives.

Follow @rdgchronicle